Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
false alarm, still single
Randomize
