i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
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