i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Randomize
