I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Randomize