weddingsv make me drug and hornr
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Randomize