that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
