I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
It's rum buckets o'clock
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Randomize
