check it out our google latitudes are spooning
My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
