so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
