Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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