I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Randomize
