i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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