she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
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