i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Randomize
