ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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