You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
