there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
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