I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
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