the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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