so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Randomize
