Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Randomize
