i permit you to call me
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
Randomize
