Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
