What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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