Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Randomize
