I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Randomize
