I just saw a hot homeless man
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
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