i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Randomize
