a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
I cut my penus on the lid.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
