I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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