plz talk dirty to me
so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Randomize
