OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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