Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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