dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
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