so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
