Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Randomize
