She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
