I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
