Your tits are I can't wait for
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
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