Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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