Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
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