But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
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