she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Randomize
