dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
