Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Randomize
