hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Couch. On fire.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Randomize
