Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
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