Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
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