He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
