I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
